Teaching on change
“Real change is letting yourself be moved.”
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Anthony de Mello

“Real change is letting yourself be moved.” In this profound statement, Anthony de Mello invites us to reconsider our understanding of transformation. Change, often perceived as a rigid process of self-improvement or external alteration, is instead portrayed as a fluid experience of openness and receptivity. This perspective emphasizes the importance of allowing ourselves to be influenced by the world around us, suggesting that true transformation arises not from forceful effort but from a gentle surrender to the currents of life.

De Mello’s insight resonates deeply in a world that often equates change with struggle and resistance. In a culture that champions control and self-discipline, the idea of being “moved” can feel unsettling. Yet, it is precisely in this vulnerability that we find the potential for authentic growth. By embracing the notion that change is not solely an act of will but a response to the unfolding of life, we open ourselves to a richer, more meaningful existence. This invitation to be moved challenges us to cultivate a posture of openness, allowing the experiences and lessons of life to shape us in profound ways.

The image / the metaphor

The imagery in de Mello's quote evokes a sense of fluidity and dynamism. The verb "moved" suggests a gentle, almost poetic motion, as if one is being swept along by a current rather than pushing against it. This movement is not chaotic; rather, it is a dance with the rhythms of existence, where one learns to navigate the ebbs and flows of life. The metaphor of being moved implies a deep engagement with the world, where we are not merely passive observers but active participants in a larger narrative.

Diving deeper into this metaphor, we can envision change as a river, constantly flowing and reshaping the landscape through which it travels. To let oneself be moved is to trust in the process, to allow the waters of experience to carve new paths within us. This requires a relinquishing of the need for control and a willingness to embrace uncertainty. In this way, de Mello’s teaching becomes a call to surrender to the natural unfolding of life, recognizing that true transformation often occurs in the spaces between our intentions and the realities we encounter.

In the speaker's tradition

Anthony de Mello's insights are deeply rooted in the Christian mystical tradition, which emphasizes the importance of inner transformation and the experience of divine presence. Concepts such as kenosis, the self-emptying of one’s will to allow for divine influence, resonate with the idea of being moved. In this context, real change is not merely about personal growth but about aligning oneself with a greater purpose, allowing the divine to work through us. This aligns with the notion of bhakti, or devotion, where surrendering to a higher power opens the heart to profound transformation.

In his work, de Mello often draws upon the teachings of Jesus, who exemplified a life of radical openness and receptivity to the will of God. The Gospel of John speaks of the necessity of being born anew, a process that requires letting go of old identities and embracing a new way of being. This transformative journey is echoed in de Mello’s call to allow ourselves to be moved, suggesting that the path to spiritual awakening lies in our willingness to be shaped by love, grace, and the experiences that life presents.

Living the teaching

Consider a modern scenario where this teaching can be applied: a person facing a significant life transition, such as a career change or the end of a relationship. In such moments, the instinct may be to cling to the familiar, to resist the inevitable shifts that life brings. However, by embracing the idea of being moved, one can approach these changes with a sense of curiosity and openness. This shift in perspective allows for the possibility of discovering new passions, forging unexpected connections, and ultimately finding a deeper sense of purpose.

In the context of relationships, the teaching of being moved can manifest in the way we engage with others. Imagine a difficult conversation with a loved one, where emotions run high and misunderstandings abound. Instead of approaching the dialogue with a defensive mindset, allowing oneself to be moved means being open to the other person's perspective, letting empathy guide the interaction. This openness can lead to healing and deeper connection, illustrating how the act of being moved can transform not only our own hearts but also the dynamics of our relationships.

A reflection

As we contemplate de Mello’s profound statement, we are invited to reflect on our own lives: In what ways am I resisting the natural flow of change? What would it look like to allow myself to be moved by the experiences and relationships that surround me? By engaging with these questions, we can begin to uncover the areas where we might cultivate greater openness, inviting the transformative power of life to shape us in ways we may not have previously imagined.

ArtistAnthony de Mello

Jesuit priest and psychotherapist who blended Christian spirituality with Buddhist and Hindu insights.

Got Questions?

De Mello emphasizes that true transformation arises from a willingness to be influenced by the world around us, rather than through rigid self-discipline or control. This perspective invites us to embrace vulnerability and openness, allowing life's experiences to shape our growth.
You can apply this teaching by practicing mindfulness and being present to your experiences. Instead of resisting change or clinging to the familiar, try to approach new situations with curiosity and openness, allowing yourself to be shaped by what you encounter.
Yes, the concept of surrendering to divine influence is prevalent in Christian mysticism. Texts such as the writings of St. John of the Cross and Teresa of Avila emphasize the importance of kenosis, or self-emptying, as a path to spiritual transformation.
Kenosis refers specifically to the act of self-emptying to allow divine influence, while being moved encompasses a broader openness to life's experiences. Both concepts emphasize surrender, but 'being moved' includes the dynamic interaction with the world around us.
Practices such as meditation, contemplative prayer, and journaling can support living this teaching. These practices encourage reflection and openness, helping you to cultivate a mindset that embraces change and allows for personal transformation.
In a challenging situation, such as a conflict with a friend, being moved might involve actively listening to their perspective and allowing their feelings to influence your understanding. This openness can lead to resolution and deeper connection, illustrating the transformative power of receptivity.

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