Teaching on mothering
“The work of mothering is the work of returning to yourself.”
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Glennon Doyle

Glennon Doyle's poignant assertion, "The work of mothering is the work of returning to yourself," invites us to explore the profound connection between nurturing others and nurturing our own inner selves. In a world that often equates mothering with self-sacrifice, Doyle's words challenge us to reconsider this narrative. They suggest that the act of caring for another can simultaneously be an act of self-discovery and reclamation. This perspective is vital, especially in a culture that frequently overlooks the importance of self-awareness in the journey of motherhood.

As we delve deeper into this quote, we uncover layers of meaning that resonate beyond the immediate context of parenting. Mothering, in this sense, transcends biological ties and encompasses the broader act of nurturing—whether it be towards children, communities, or even oneself. The notion of "returning to yourself" implies a journey back to one's essence, a reclamation of identity that may have been obscured by the demands of caregiving. This exploration is not merely a personal endeavor; it is a collective awakening that speaks to the heart of modern spirituality, where the intertwining of self and service is celebrated as a sacred dance.

The image / the metaphor

At its core, Doyle's quote evokes a powerful image of mothering as a cyclical journey. The verb "returning" suggests a movement towards something that is inherently ours, something that may have been lost or set aside in the act of caring for others. This imagery resonates with the idea of a homecoming, where the self is not just rediscovered but also redefined through the experiences of nurturing. The work of mothering, then, becomes a transformative process, one that invites us to embrace our vulnerabilities and strengths alike.

Diving deeper into this metaphor, we can see that mothering is not solely about the physical act of raising children; it is also about the emotional and spiritual labor involved in fostering growth—both in others and within ourselves. This duality reflects the interconnectedness of life, where the act of giving can lead to profound self-awareness. In this light, mothering becomes a sacred practice, a way to cultivate compassion, resilience, and authenticity, ultimately guiding us back to our true selves.

In the speaker's tradition

Glennon Doyle's insights are rooted in the contemporary landscape of modern spirituality, which emphasizes the importance of self-awareness and authenticity. Concepts such as dharma—the idea of living one's true purpose—and kenosis, the act of self-emptying for the sake of others, resonate deeply with her message. In this tradition, mothering is not merely a role but a spiritual path that invites us to explore our inner landscapes while simultaneously engaging with the world around us. This dual focus aligns with the principles of bhakti, where devotion to others can lead to a deeper understanding of oneself.

In her book "Love Warrior," Doyle articulates her journey of self-discovery through the lens of motherhood, illustrating how the challenges of raising children can illuminate our own shadows and strengths. This narrative echoes the teachings found in various spiritual texts, where the journey inward is often mirrored by the journey outward. Just as the Buddha spoke of sunyata, or emptiness, as a pathway to enlightenment, Doyle suggests that the act of mothering can lead us to a profound understanding of our own essence, revealing the interconnectedness of all beings.

Living the teaching

Consider a modern scenario where a mother, overwhelmed by the demands of her family, finds herself losing touch with her own identity. In the midst of juggling work, household responsibilities, and the emotional needs of her children, she may feel as though she has become a mere caretaker, detached from her own desires and aspirations. However, by embracing Doyle's teaching, she can begin to view her mothering not just as a duty but as an opportunity for self-exploration. Through moments of stillness, journaling, or engaging in creative pursuits, she can reclaim her sense of self, recognizing that nurturing her own spirit enriches her ability to nurture others.

In another context, imagine a relationship where one partner feels the weight of caregiving responsibilities. This dynamic can lead to feelings of resentment or disconnection. By applying Doyle's wisdom, both partners can engage in open conversations about their needs and desires, fostering an environment where each person feels seen and valued. This practice of mutual nurturing not only strengthens their bond but also allows each individual to return to their authentic selves, creating a harmonious balance between giving and receiving love.

A reflection

As we contemplate the essence of Doyle's quote, we are invited to ask ourselves: In what ways can I embrace the work of mothering—whether towards others or myself—as a pathway to rediscovering my true self? This question encourages us to reflect on our own journeys, recognizing that the act of nurturing is not a sacrifice but a sacred opportunity for growth and transformation. By engaging with this inquiry, we open ourselves to the possibility of a deeper connection with both ourselves and the world around us.

Artist
Glennon Doyle

Wisdom from Glennon Doyle.

Got Questions?

Doyle suggests that the act of mothering is not just about caring for others, but also about rediscovering and nurturing one's own identity. This perspective challenges the notion that self-sacrifice is inherent in motherhood, emphasizing instead that nurturing others can lead to profound self-awareness and personal growth.
You can apply this teaching by intentionally carving out time for self-reflection and self-care amidst your caregiving responsibilities. Engaging in activities that bring you joy and fulfillment can help you reconnect with your own identity, allowing you to nurture both yourself and those you care for more effectively.
Yes, the idea of nurturing oneself while caring for others is a common theme in modern spirituality. Many contemporary authors emphasize the importance of self-awareness and authenticity, suggesting that personal growth often occurs through the act of serving and loving others.
Self-sacrifice implies giving up one's own needs for the sake of others, often leading to burnout and resentment. In contrast, self-nurturing involves recognizing and honoring one's own needs while still being present for others, creating a sustainable balance that fosters both personal and relational growth.
Practices such as mindfulness meditation, journaling, or engaging in creative pursuits can support living this teaching. These activities encourage self-reflection and help you reconnect with your inner self, allowing you to approach your caregiving roles with renewed energy and clarity.

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